Your Thoughts on Black People and Online Dating

What do you think about African-American and Online Dating?  What has been your experience?  Would you recommend it to your friends?  Do you think that it would open up multi-cultural options for single Black women?  What are your thoughts?

My Opinion:  I’ve tried a number of dating sites in the past.  EHarmony was the worst. I suggest the recruit more African-Americans and other ethnicities for balance.  They could consider creating a campaign targeting African-Americans that plays on the “Christian values” part of their market.  A lot of holy rollers looking for love would go for that.  I’ve heard that BlackPeopleMeet is pretty bad in terms of people acting like they are on Craigslist’s Casual Encounters.  As an African-American woman, I found my overall online dating experiences lacking.  I’m  someone who wanted a real relationship and not just something casual.  However, I came to believe that you have to lower your expectations when you’re dating online because 1) People lie (and post old photos), 2) Married people and people who should be allowed to date are trolling on these sites (check out and 3) Online dating doesn’t bring out the best in everyone.

Something to consider: In the past, Gallup polls have shown  that half of all Black Americans believe it’s “very important” for couples to marry when they have a child — yet according to research from Packaged Facts, more than six out of ten Black Americans are unmarried, thereby making that group the most unattached in America.


Filed under african american, black men, black women, culture, interracial, love, opinion, race, relationships, women

2 Responses to Your Thoughts on Black People and Online Dating

  1. WestIndianWriter

    You mention that you “tried” a number of different sites and that you are looking for a “real” relationship. Although I object to the idea of “looking” for a relationship-I believe that God will just send you someone-here’s what I recommend anyway. I am not sure if you are looking for marriage or just a long-term relationship. Personally, I had great experiences with a few years back. I met several very nice, successful, good looking brothas. That was several years ago and I was more into the party lifestyle. Ironically, they were the ones who wanted something more serious so obviously those didn’t work out.
    There is no such thing as “online dating”. Only “online meeting”. Dating is a contact sport.
    Now that I’m older, (early 30’s), I prefer to just introduce myself to people in person. In your case, I think you should try a “friendship first” approach, rather than pressuring yourself to get into a serious relationship. It’s great having a network of men to call upon for movies, dinner, church, etc. Time will weed out the ones who aren’t for you. Hope this helps.
    Right now, I am not dating anyone, but I am interested in a man I have been friends with for several months.
    BTW, I’m not sure if your “Christian values” comment was meant to be sarcastic. I am a Christian and think the #1 problem with Black people in general is our defiance of true Christian fellowship and values.

    • WestIndianWriter: Actually, I wasn’t looking for advice…but your comment might someone else. I’m currently in a very loving relationship that was not a result of online dating.

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