Monthly Archives: November 2010

Black Women Opening Up to the Idea of Dating White Men

When I first arrived in DC, I would say that it was extremely rare to see an interracial couple composed of a Black Woman and a White Man.  An Oddity of sorts.  Now, don’t get me wrong.  I’m all for it.  Other than a few visions of Master/Slave forced relations that pop into my head at the initial thought, I think it’s a win win.

In the last 2 years, on the streets of DC, I’ve noticed a huge rise in the number of Black Women and White Men I see coupled up.  I’m talking young, old, professional, yuppies, bohos, BMW drivers, and pickup truck enthusiasts.  Blacks and whites of all different strata.  I know Essence did an article on this topic maybe a year ago, so maybe people took that as a permission slip.  I’m just wondering, Hello Negro family, if you’re seeing what I’m seeing and what you think about it? Does this form of interracial dating carry the stigma that Black Man/White Woman dating does for some in the African American community?

Honestly, I’m real tried to hearing the “I can’t find a man” swan song from African-American professional women who have never tried online dating or interracial dating (two things I usually recommend when I hear people bitching about their singleness).  Time to get down with the swirl, Ladies.

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Filed under african american, black women, community, culture, d.c., love, opinion, relationships, washington dc, white folks

Racism is…

I was just reading that Anti–racism activist and author, Paul Kivel describes the institutionalization of racism as “ the uneven and unfair distribution of power, privilege, land and material goods favoring white people.”

Great definition.

Interesting…

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Filed under african american, community, culture, race, racism

Complete this Sentence: Psychologists told Black People to stop spanking their kids and now…

Finish this sentence for me, people:  “Psychologists told Black People to stop spanking their kids and now…”  You can leave a comment below.

Why do I ask?  Crazy “youngins” on the metro this morning.

If you live in DC, you know that African-American kids can act a dignified fool on the metro trains.  I blame this on the fact that many black parents stopped spanking their kids and strayed from the time-tested methods of discipline that worked for our foremothers and forefathers.

Do you think Martin Luther King was put in time out?  Did Ruby Dee and Ossie Davis have to sit there and think about what they’d done…and then write a letter to their victim as punishment?  I would venture to say that many a famous negro of yesteryear received proper spankings.  I’m not talking extension cords, big wooden boards,  and other out of the ordinary stuff.  I’m not talking about anything that leaves bruises or welts.  Spanking with a hand or belt, NOT beatings.  You can disagree with me and if you think it’s abuse, you’re entitled to your opinion.  As am I.

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Filed under african american, black, black history, children, culture, d.c., opinion, society, youth

“Baby Momma” and other things that are not job titles

“Baby Momma” is not a job title.  It should not be the period at the end of your life’s run-on sentence.  I don’t care if your Baby Daddy is Lil Wayne and you’re standing at Rikers Island today with arms wide open and a fresh weave (all 3…I mean 4 of yall…I think…hell I don’t know how many chicks have had Lil Wayne’s kids!).

I know a whole lot of strong single moms out there who are not just “baby mommas”.  They are working professionals, artists, spiritual sages, supportive friends, and so much more.  I’m seeing a wave on TV and online (blogs mostly) where black women who have had babies by male stars are simply referred to as “So-in-so’s Baby Momma”.  Not the “Girlfriend” or “Ex-girlfriend”.  Not the “Mother of his child”.  No acknowledgement of the fact that some of these women are stars in their own right, business owners, etc.  I take issue with this because we live in an aspirational society where we see black girls striving to be video vixens.  I’m talking “stand there and shake you butt” chicks, not I have a “M.F.A in Dance from Howard” professional dancers.  (I can respect strippers more than video models because they have a regular gig and can work a 40 hour week.)  Will young girls looking for acceptance and wanting the fame decide that being the “Baby Momma” of some notable man is the new route to stardom?

Just because you get a check doesn’t make it a job.  Things happen.  A lot of women are single moms, but most of the ones I know would not suggest someone take on that role in an effort to come up in the world.  It’s not different than aspiring to win the lottery or play for the NBA…most that try won’t win and most try won’t play.

Other things that aren’t job titles:

  • BOSS – Said the way Fantasia’s brother says it.  If you don’t have employees on a payroll, you’re not a boss
  • Jumpoff
  • Video Vixen – Not the same as a model
  • Rapper – If you are over the age of 40 and you’re not legend in the game.  It could be a hobby, though.

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Filed under african american, black, black women, celebrity, children, culture, family, opinion, relationships, sex, women, youth

The Set UP: If you think the GOP and Tea Party Wins Are Bad for Obama, Think Harder

I have 2 words for everyone who thinks that the GOP and Tea Party victories in the 2010 Election are bad for Obama.  BILL CLINTON

Everyone talks a big game.  It’s when game times comes that we see who the real champions are.  It’s game time, but as they say “the game doesn’t change, just the players”.  Have we seen this team on the right wing bench before?

In Bill Clinton’s day, the GOP said they could do a better job.  American put them in the game.  They shut the government down and talked a lot of bull.  That veto pin was really busy.  In the end, America realized that ole Bill Clinton wasn’t that bad in comparison.  People rejected the GOP’s efforts and Clinton got a second term.  OH, and America got a budget surplus.  We could use a surplus right now, right?

Now, I’m not saying that the GOP of old was absolutely terrible.  The fact that both Clinton and the right had to move to the center helped in many ways.   I should also note that there was much collaboration and cooperation at that time.  We haven’t seen much of that between the parties during this administration.

My prediction is that the GOP will be challenged not only by the left, but also by the Tea Party whom they’ve catered to and made promises to.  If they can’t live up to the hype they’ve created, I predict that it will help Obama win re-election in 2012.  Their candidate will be associated with their failure.

Hopefully, those representing the GOP/Tea Party will be held accountable and not allowed to sell out to corporations and special interests.  With regard to reigning in spending…good luck with that.  Social Security is killing us, but it’s still a sacred cow.

Oh, let’s add to this that I don’t see any right-wing contenders for the Presidency (as of this date) who could win over conservative liberals and is popular with independents.  Palin doesn’t count.

In the end…these election results could end up helping President Obama win re-election in 2012.  There is always a set up, people.  Always.

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Filed under d.c., government, news, obama, opinion, politics, washington dc