Tag Archives: marriage

Your Thoughts on Black People and Online Dating

What do you think about African-American and Online Dating?  What has been your experience?  Would you recommend it to your friends?  Do you think that it would open up multi-cultural options for single Black women?  What are your thoughts?

My Opinion:  I’ve tried a number of dating sites in the past.  EHarmony was the worst. I suggest the recruit more African-Americans and other ethnicities for balance.  They could consider creating a campaign targeting African-Americans that plays on the “Christian values” part of their market.  A lot of holy rollers looking for love would go for that.  I’ve heard that BlackPeopleMeet is pretty bad in terms of people acting like they are on Craigslist’s Casual Encounters.  As an African-American woman, I found my overall online dating experiences lacking.  I’m  someone who wanted a real relationship and not just something casual.  However, I came to believe that you have to lower your expectations when you’re dating online because 1) People lie (and post old photos), 2) Married people and people who should be allowed to date are trolling on these sites (check out dontdatehimgirl.com) and 3) Online dating doesn’t bring out the best in everyone.

Something to consider: In the past, Gallup polls have shown  that half of all Black Americans believe it’s “very important” for couples to marry when they have a child — yet according to research from Packaged Facts, more than six out of ten Black Americans are unmarried, thereby making that group the most unattached in America.

2 Comments

Filed under african american, black men, black women, culture, interracial, love, opinion, race, relationships, women

Bishop Weeks Looking for Wife # 3

DULUTH, Ga. (AP) — The ex-husband of national televangelist Juanita Bynum, who divorced after a parking lot fight between the two landed him in jail, plans to take his search for a new wife to the Internet with videos featuring dating tips and what he’s looking for in a mate.

Thomas W. Weeks III, a minister who runs an Atlanta-area church and is known to his followers as Bishop Weeks, said the 10-episode series will be available starting Tuesday on his Web site.

Excerpts available Friday included Weeks, 41, discussing with aides what he should look for in his third wife.

The group concludes the woman should be at least 25 years old but “with special exemptions for 21 and up if they are classy,” Weeks said. She also must want to have children with him.

“This woman has to be very discerning, and very intimate, and very social and very sensual,” Weeks says, laughing. “And on the ministry side she has to be very diverse. She can’t be ugly.”

Bynum, 49, filed for divorce after the couple had an August, 2007, fight in an Atlanta hotel parking lot that landed Weeks in jail on charges that he pushed, choked and beat Bynum.

He pleaded guilty to assaulting her, is serving three years’ probation and has completed court ordered community service and anger management counseling.

In a video on the Web site of his Duluth-based church, Global Destiny International Ministries, Weeks said thousands of people have been writing him to ask about his plans as a newly single man.

He said he wants to give people a Christian perspective on dating.

“Who is going to be the next Mrs. Weeks? Well, God knows,” Weeks said. In the video, he asks viewers to e-mail him dating advice.

Messages left for Weeks at the church were not returned Friday morning. Bynum’s Los Angeles-based publicist also did not return calls.

If Weeks does find love, his attorney Randy Kessler told The Associated Press Friday, “I’d probably do the prenup for free.”

Who needs match.com or eharmony when you can just use your ministry website to hook yourself up? Lol!!! He discusses what he’s looking for and is even taking suggestions on his website. Comments please.

12 Comments

Filed under abuse, black man, black women, celebrity, church, culture, dating, drama, juanita bynum, love, money, opinion, religion

Single Black Men: Is marriage really for white people?

Watch this video and here what Brothers have to say about the matter (from CNN’s Special Reports area of the “Black in America” site.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/wayoflife/07/22/single.black.women/
index.html#cnnSTCVideo

FYI: They also posted this great article on one sista’s singleness http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/wayoflife/07/22/single.black.women/
index.html

2 Comments

Filed under african american, black man, black men, black women, community, dating, history, interracial, love, race, relationships, women

Single Black Women, let us pray…

…for this Negro. *sigh*

A few days ago I wrote about a documentary called The Wedding Proprosal (click here) that featured an interview with Thomas Lopez-Pierre of the Harlem Club. Mr. Lopez-Pierre had some “interesting” [cough...scathing] things to say about the prospects most black women have when it comes to getting married. He came off very pompous and flippant, so I was not surprised that he took the time to comment on the post. Here’s what he had to say:

To my professional Black sisters:

I am sorry that so many of you will never find a husband.

Only God will be able to help you.

Thomas Lopez-Pierre
Managing Member
Harlem Club, LLC
HarlemClub.com

LOL. What kind of advice is that? The situation out here is so bad that Mr. Lopez-Pierre suggests that you call on the Lord! Or, if you’re cute you can send a headshot and if you’re worthy old boy might let you join the Harlem Club (headshots required for the ladies). Well ladies, what do you think? Is God your only hope and refuge?

22 Comments

Filed under african american, black, black man, black women, love, opinion, women

The Wedding Proprosal, hope and single black women

The Wedding Proposal is a personal documentary where the filmmaker takes stock of her life style and romantic choices during the year of her 35th birthday. The film examines the institution of marriage, opinions and attitudes about marriage and marriage options from the viewpoint of professional African-American women my age and older.”

Thomas Lopez-Pierre (holding private placement memorandum) with models during casting call for Fashion Show Club Magazine /investor presentation for Lopez-Pierre Realty, LLC, November 19, 2007 (NYC)
Thomas Lopez-Pierre (holding private placement memorandum) with models during casting call for Fashion Show Club Magazine /investor presentation for Lopez-Pierre Realty, LLC, November 19, 2007 (NYC)

I’m watching Anjanette Levert’s documentary on BET right now. The filmmaker, an educated African-American journalist, celebrates her 35th birthday and acknowledges to her dismay that she is STILL unmarried. For answers she turns to her family, her friends and a very interesting negro…Thomas Lopez Pierre, Managing Partner of The Harlem Club, a private social club for professional African-Americans. Any professional man is eligible to join, but women must be under 35, single, have no children; AND they must also submit head and body photos. Thomas points out the troubling statistic that of those African-Americans that graduate college, 65% are women. That leaves a shortage of available professional men for women like Anjanette. As you might think, the ladies in the documentary are not feeling Mr. Lopez. He says that most professional men don’t want a partner (who is a professional woman who works and that they have to support in their goals and journey to success) …they want a wife and that they want to walk into the room with a drop dead gorgeous woman/trophy that personifies their success. He also says there is NO hope for any unmarried black woman over the age of 35. Very interesting…sigh.

What do I think?
Everybody wants love. No body wants to be one of “those women”.  Yall know what I’m talking about!

Very interesting so far…it will be on again as part of the Black Stories series, I’m sure.

31 Comments

Filed under african american, black, black men, black women, community, dating, drama, love, opinion, race, society, stereotype, video, women

Jay-Z and Beyonce Marriage Rumors are the talk of the Black Blogosphere

Here’s what I heard…

There was a swirl of activity Friday at the rap mogul’s Tribeca apartment. Delivery trucks funneled in and out of the building, dropping off silver candelabras and white flowers. A white tent was set up on the roof, and stars including Beyonce’s former Destiny’s Child bandmates, Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams, were spotted.

A swarm of media camped outside the building was in a state of frenzy, snapping and shouting at any sport-utility vehicle that drove down the cobblestone street. They caught Actress Gwyneth Paltrow, a friend of Knowles, arriving. TMZ even streamed the action live on their Web site – until their battery ran out.

Gossip sites showed photos of orchids being delivered to the building and a tent set up on what was said to be the balcony of Carter’s home.

E! News quoted the owner of Amy’s Orchids in Thailand as saying her company shipped orchids to New York for Knowles’ and Carter’s wedding Friday. A designer in the city used 60,000 orchids to create “eight-foot garlands that hung down from the ceiling to make the location look like an orchid palace.”

The Web sites of People and Us Weekly reported the couple married and threw a lavish but small party at the apartment Friday, citing unnamed sources who are friends with the pair. A source told People.com that singer Beyonce Knowles, 26, and rapper Jay-Z, 38, tied the knot early Friday evening, and then celebrated with a party at the rapper’s home.

The Web sites reported their families attended the party. The Web site AllHipHop.com wrote that “an extremely close source” said the couple were indeed husband and wife. As of Saturday evening there was still no official confirmation that the couple were married.

Rumors circulated all week about the event after a report that the couple had taken out a marriage license in Scarsdale, N.Y. Representatives for Beyonce Knowles and Jay-Z declined to comment on reports ahead of the event. Jay-Z’s publicist had no comment Saturday. Some skeptics said that the event might have simply been a celebration of the $150 million deal Carter made with Live Nation earlier this week.

Sources: CBS NEWS Showbuzz and Associated Press

2 Comments

Filed under african american, black, black man, black women, celebrity, dating, events, hip hop, hollywood, love, media, opinion

Are black people between the ages of 28-45 getting married?

Readers, I need you to think…dig deep for me.  LOL!  How many of the 28-45 year old, single African American you know have gotten married in the last…let’s say 5 years.

I KTruth and I live in DC, and we were going around looking at condo open houses this weekend.  It occurred to us that one of the reasons we always see a lot of single black females between 28-45 house shopping alone or with their bffs is that they are just that…single.  Thus, their options for finding housing are limited to what one can afford in the District of Columbia on one income.  That isn’t always pretty.  There are areas of the city (rough areas…you know where DC folk) that real estate professionals know the main market will be single, professional, black women.  They price the properties for this market and advertise to them.  The conversation also made me ponder how many of my peers or friends of friends have gotten hitched in recent years (male and female).   The number isn’t a cold hearted zero…but it’s not like I’m looking for dates to take to weddings every other weekend in June.  It made me think of the good ole days, when my parent’s generation was buying homes after marriage (2 income house-hold) like a right of passage.

Ummm….I wonder.   We talk about the plight and impact of the high number of single African American mothers run households in our communities.  What about the childless African American brothers and sister with good jobs who are single?  How does this impact our communities financially when it comes to owning homes and sharing resources? It seems like my generation is waiting longer and longer to marry.  Are they more concerned with career and personal goals?  Have they been scared away from commitment as witnesses of divorce and failed marriages?  What do you think?

42 Comments

Filed under african american, black, black man, black women, culture, dating, family, money, opinion, race, relationships, society, women

The Worst “Moment of Truth” Clip

Karma is a Bitch, Kids! You really don’t want to experience it LIVE on nationals television.

This brother should have known better.

3 Comments

Filed under drama, hollywood, love, media, relationships, sex, white folks, why, women, youtube

Black Women Doing the White Thang in the UK

As black women dating white men becomes a topic I see more and more of in the black press and on blogs, I wonder…Will the stigma that haunts these relationships in the US be as large as the one that haunts Black Male/White Female relations.

From Why black women are doing the white thing

Now, rather than sitting around dreaming about the perfect black man, black women are considering the possibility that ‘Mr. Right’ could be white.  Casting aside reservations about interracial relationships – for some, due to the atrocities committed during slavery – they are beginning to look past race when choosing a potential mate.

Race doesn’t matter to Paul Kennedy and Michelle Clarke. Best friends since primary school, they are now in a relationship together. Kennedy is white and Clarke is black.  “People are finding people with common interests and common perspectives and are putting race aside,” says Clarke, 26, a Middlesex University graduate who works at Barclay’s Bank.

Clarke and her friends are among the new generation of black females that are opting to date outside of their race due to their social environment. Like Clarke, the majority of young people have friends or acquaintances of different races and nationalities, and are seen as more tolerant and open-minded than previous generations. Unlike their parents and grandparents, today’s teens and twenty-somethings have grown up hearing the buzzwords ‘diversity,’ ‘multicultural’ and ‘inclusion’, and are used to seeing interracial friendship and romance portrayed in films and on TV – especially in soap operas and adverts.

“I don’t see colour as an issue,” states Clarke. “We have been very happy together and apart from a few isolated incidents, we have not experienced any open hostility towards our relationship.” Continue reading

4 Comments

Filed under black, black man, black women, change, culture, dating, news, opinion, relationships, society, stereotype, women

42.3% of Black Women Have Never Been Married

How many of you can identify with these women??? Do you believe that everyone has a soulmate???

“We are the most un-partnered people in the United States.” Dayum…that is a powerful statement. Andrea Wiley is talking about it in her documentary “SoulMate“. It was featured in the 5 part series that NBC did on Black Women in America. From the website…

For those still waiting to exhale, Soulmate is a gripping cinematic journey into the realities facing today’s successful, saved, and single African American women. This deeply personal portrait reveals the trials, and triumphs of unforgettable women while offering hope and practical advice on such issues as loneliness, the desire for sexual intimacy, men on the “down low”, the ticking biological clock and the uncertainty of the future. This film offers uplifting revelations about the quest for your true… “Soulmate.”

1 Comment

Filed under african american, black, black man, black women, community, love, media, opinion, relationships, society, women